Lesson Learned: I'm the only thing standing between me and the person I want to be.

It turns out it really WAS just me that was the problem all along.  Every time I would try and make the changes I needed to change my life I kept thinking over and over "ugh! this is too hard! I don't want to have to do this for the rest of my life!" And then, when the results weren't immediately gratifying ... I would give up.  It was too much, it was too over-whelming.

Uh ... I just didn't keep at it long enough!!! You have to take it one habit at a time until that habit is truly a part of who you ARE ... then tackle the next challenge.  Then the next.  And the next.  And don't get frustrated by how slow you are progressing.  My average weight loss is only 5 pounds a month.  And I work HARD for those 5 pounds.  But guess what ... 5 pounds every month over an entire year ... well ... math people? Anyone? ... Yeah ... it's 60 pounds a year.  Um, that's a LOT.

So now give me your excuses for why you aren't starting now, Today ... I've heard them all.  I've SAID them all.  Here we go:

I don't have time to workout every day ... uh, yeah you do.  It's only an hour.  You just have to schedule it and make it happen.

Eating healthy costs too much money ... yeah, and so does McDonalds and Pizza Hut.  But somehow we always find the money for that.  And soda.  And a few treats.  And maybe some ice cream.  It's just a matter of budgeting it in, and making it a priority.  Eat healthy.  For the same amount of money it costs to order your family pizza twice a month you could buy a daily amount of Shakeology that gives you an insane amount of nutrition and helps keep all the junk food cravings away.

I am too out of shape, it's embarrassing ... Um, HELLO ... 299 pounds!! Been there.  You have to start somewhere.

I have too many pains in my body ... yep ... modify and start slow.  Find the right workout and build on it.  Easy. Next.

I hate working out ... so did I.

I hate 5 am ... so did I.

I'm too old ... well, I was 34, not old but definitely not young.

See that smile, see the sweat  ... it could be you.  

I love food ... so DO I.

It's too hard ... yeah, it is.  But it gets easier.

Go ... give me your excuses ... I'm ready for you ... Trust me.  Just start today.  Decide TODAY that you are sick of being overweight, tired, sore, depressed, angry, frustrated, whatever ... If you need help email me or find me on Facebook ... I know the answer ... all the answers :)

Lesson Learned: It's a freaking sand dune out here!

I have been thinking of this for a while, and now seems like a good time to say it: Losing weight and changing your life is FREAKING HARD!!! It's like climbing up a giant sand dune.  And not one of those wimpy little beach sand hills ... I'm talking the Sahara Mountains of Dunes.  The second you stop fighting you start sliding backward.  It sucks.  Big time.  And it gets REALLY discouraging.

Great Wall of China: 2011

However ...  and this is a true story: Last Fall (as I've mentioned before) I did the Beach Body Ultimate Reset.  Its a 21 Day Cleanse/Total Food Makeover.  You follow a very strict eating plan.  The first week you cut out all dairy and red meat, the last two weeks you switch to a vegetarian/vegan diet.  It's tough.  One of the hardest things I've EVER done.  So, my point is ... as I've talked to more people who have done the cleanse, I started to realize I am one of the only ones, if not the ONLY one (of the 20 or so I know who did it with me or after me) who stuck to the plan exactly.  No cheating.  Not one thing crossed my lips that wasn't on the food list.  I did it while my husband was gone for training and over my 34th birthday and STILL ... I followed the plan exactly.  But I realized why ... losing weight for me has already been FREAKING HARD!!! I've had to discipline myself in SO many new ways, and change SO many bad habits, that I was already ready to try something of this magnitude.  And ... Because life isn't fair. Loosing weight or maintaining weight for some people is easier.  It really is.  They don't need to be quite so disciplined.  They don't have to change everything about themselves to make it happen.  But I did.  I have slowly started changing EVERYTHING about myself.  And so in the end I guess I'm lucky.  I'm lucky I learned to do things that are difficult.  It's taught me perseverance and discipline and it has given me a crazy amount of will power.  It's like the scripture that says:

"I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them."

I say this with utmost humility of course ...

This is me, climbing the Great Wall of China with a 35 pound kid on my back ... I weighed about 270 at the time. If I can do THAT ... Well ... 

Success: My Story

I already posted this on my Facebook "Like" Page, but I wanted to Blog about it as well for those who haven't joined me on Facebook yet. I was looking through my iPhoto library today and found some of my old "before and after" photos. When they were put in order I realized just how awesome this journey has been so far. And I can't wait to see where this year will eld.

My goal is to reach 1000 likes for HalftheWomanIWas. I want to find people who need my story. I want to find that one person who needs someone to understand how hard it is and to convince them to NOT give up. Please PLEASE share my page with your family and friends. Help me find that person who has given up and just needs an extra push to know that they really CAN do it!

Check it:


March 2010


March 2012


May 2012


July 2012



October 2012


November 2012

Success: He misses me

My husband is one of those people who can pretty much eat the entire cheesecake factory and still look slim and awesome.  So getting him to switch our family eating habits to more healthy ones was tricky.  He did it ... but not with a smile on his face.  More of a subdued acceptance because he knew it was important to me.  And then I had him try Shakeology.  At first he was like, "eh, fine, only because you are making me." And then he started to like it.  Then he loved it.  Now he NEEDS it.  Then I took out all the easy access treats because I am a sugar junkie and I can't say no if it is around.  That was a sad day for my poor man.  Then I started adding more vegetarian meals to our weekly meal plan, and more fruits and vegetables to everything.  At first he was like "ugh, more veggies." And then he started to like it.  And then ... he left for a few weeks of training.  But he sent me a text about three days after he left and he said, "Man, the food here is horrible.  Not that I am super healthy but it is a big difference in food.  I miss Shakeology and the other healthy stuff you make me eat.  MRE's just do not feel right anymore, like I am putting inferior fuel in." HAH!! SUCESS!! I love you babe.  I love that you support me in all my crazy ideas, even if you are only doing it for me.  And I love even more that you are starting to love all my new crazy ideas :)

Confession: Food still has an emotional connection for me

It's true ... Food and I are still great friends.  I need it ... emotionally.  I realized this big time last fall when I did Beach Body's Ultimate Reset.  It's a 21 day total food reset, or cleanse, and I did it over my birthday.  I tried for a really long time to think of something fun to do on my birthday since my husband was gone and some friends offered to watch my kids so I could do something awesome ... and I couldn't think of a singe thing to do.  If I went to the beach or hiking I would have got too hungry and Salad was all I could have for lunch.  If I went to the movies water was all I could get and the smell of pop corn would have been torture.  A drive to the North Shore just didn't sound fun at all without being able to stop at our favorite grill for shrimp or a burger.  I NEED food.  I need it.  I had no idea how much until that moment.

But ... my emotional connection to food is definitely getting healthier.  Fruit and yogurt can take the place of ice cream most nights.  Veggies and Hummus instead of chips.  Chocolate Shakeology for the chocolate cravings.  But sometimes, when exercise, water and Shakeology just aren't enough ... I still make brownies.  And they are delicious.  And they make me feel better.  They really do.  So as long as I don't eat the whole pan of brownies ... I'm going to continue baking brownies to make me feel better.  Indulgence ... but under-control-indulgence.  Mmmmm.  Brownies.