I Pinky Swear ...

So I have been reading a personal development book for a while now ... "PUSH" by Chalene Johnson (which I HIGHLY recommend.)  It's about time management, setting goals, and getting healthy and it is LIFE CHANGING.  Anyway ... you set goals through the course of the book and she teaches you how to achieve them.  One of the things she recommends is sharing your goals with people who will keep you accountable.  I've decided You are those people that I want to share my Health Goal with, and I need you all to keep me accountable :)

It took me a long time to come up with my "Health Goal." A goal that would make all other health related goals attainable ... if that makes sense.  It used to be "weigh 150 pounds." But I decided that was a lame goal.  It was forcing me to focus too much on numbers.  My original health goal was "to be more healthy by 35 than I was at 25." But honestly ... I've already reached that goal.  I don't weigh the same, but I AM more healthy.  I exercise every single day instead of playing soccer twice a week for 3 hours at a time.  And when I was 25 I was just at the end of being a "starving student" so I KNOW the way I eat is so so so much healthier.  Still, it's pretty awesome that I'm almost 35, a mother of 3 and a stay at home mom and I'm Healthier than I was at 25, yes????

Okay so I needed a new goal.  And I had to really really think about this.  A logical one would be "run a marathon ... " but I Hate running, don't even want to do it.  Something along those lines though ... I was stumped.  And then I found my goal.  I found my perfect "this is what I want from life" Health Goal.  And I'm sharing it with all of you for accountability.

"I promise that I will love the way I look by the end of this year."

See what I did there?? No specific number, but it's still achievable.  And it's more than just a try and lose weight (which I am STILL GOING TO DO.  I Will get past this plateau, I Will figure it out!!) It will also require that I work on my own positive self image.  Not just a physical thing but an emotional thing.  And I love it.  I love this new goal.  So that's it.  You are now my accountability friends.  And I appreciate it more than I can say.

It's time to get real

People .... another month has gone by ... and I'm stuck in that same 3 pound window.  UGH!!! Okay, to be fair ... I HAVE lost 5 inches over all since I started Insanity.  And I know inches are what really matter ... But STILL!!! It's been 5 months since I've really been below this 3 pound window (214-217). Up and down up and down.  The last time I got lower than this was doing the Ultimate Reset in October.  Since then it's been right inside this window, except for a couple of weeks when I got back up over 220.  Now ... if I was down to say 155 or 160 and I just couldn't get my body under that ... I would be totally fine.  I would just chalk it up to "maybe this is just how much my body needs to weigh." But I know 215 can't be my final weight loss point.  It just can't.  Ask any doctor, they will tell you I am still obese.

So ... now what? I have religiously kept my calories to 1400-1600, I eat the healthiest version of everything I can, and I sincerely ask myself before I eat "what is it my body NEEDS to eat" and almost never indulge in any kind of sweets.  I drink 4-5 liters of water every day.  I'm seriously asking ... what else is there? What am I doing wrong?? Anyone who has lost more than 60 pounds ... did the weight just keep coming off or did you hit a plateau? What did you do to break it??

Today I am posting pictures of one of my first Fit Clubs ever and one from today, because I can see a real difference ... and I need to be reminded that it's a journey, and I still wouldn't go back and change a thing.

Exercise is on my mind

Next soap box topic ... hmmmm, it's possible I have way too many soap boxes.  Oh well ... anyway...

Exercise.  It's been on my mind lately.  I've talked about my personal journey from hating "I HAVE to work out every day" to NEEDING my daily dose of endorphins.  But that's not today's topic ... the thing I keep thinking about is "exercising to lose weight. " A lot of people exercise to lose weight.  And exercise IS an important part of any weight loss journey for many reasons.  It helps you get more energy, build muscles, and muscles burn more calories at rest than fat does, and one of my favorite side effects ... you get a lot more self confidence.  Even if you aren't the skinny girl at the gym, you're the fat girl on a bike ... you feel better about yourself.  You feel embowered.  THAT is why I exercise.  For that feeling of empowerment.  And to be healthy.  I exercise to be healthy.

Losing weight really is all about the nutrition ... which is obviously something I'm still struggling to find a balance for.  But the exercise, that I can do.  Every day.  And I love it.  I won't miss it.  It takes me about an hour and a half to get dressed, exercise, shower and get dressed again for the day.  An hour and a half out of the day that I focus on myself. And it's worth every minute.  Even ask my kids.  We have a lot more fun together now, even with that extra hour and a half of "not focusing on my kids."

So it begs the question: What kind of exercise is the best kind of exercise? or What do I do if I hate exercising? And it's the same answer ... from one of my favorite books "Push" by Chalene Johnson (I highly recommend it) "the best kind of exercise is the kind that you'll do." So it isn't about Insanity VS Running a Marathon ... we're all on the same team.  If the gym is the one place you know you'll exercise, go to the gym.  If running is your thing, run.  At least to start out, you have to find something you don't mind doing so much, until you love it.  Then once you LOVE exercise just for exercising, you can experiment and see if there are actually other things out there for you to love.  I always thought I had to run to exercise and get in shape.  Turns out there were a LOT more options.  I was able to force myself to exercise every day at first because I LOVE P90X.  I didn't know I could love anything that much.  Soccer was always my love.  But it was just too hard with being a single mom 80% of the time to be able to play a team sport out of the house.  Now I've found something I can do from home, still spend the majority of my time with my kids, I don't have to pay for a babysitter ... and I'm a LOT more healthy and my self confidence is soaring. FIND YOUR SOUL MATE WORKOUT!!!!! I only wish I would have found it 10 years ago ... don't wait any longer, go out and find it!

It's on my mind too much

I read an article posted by a friend of mine the other day ... and I've been thinking about it ever since.  The things I've thought about, as I've contemplated what it is about the article that has pricked me over and over, well, they are worth sharing.  I highly recommend reading the article first, because the rest of this will only really make sense if you do :)

Here's the thing ... I actually agree with at least 85% of everything the author says.  I enjoyed it.  Being a mom is a BUSY job and it really doesn't leave me with a lot of time for myself every day.  In fact, if I didn't wake up early to get my workout in before my kids woke up, it would most likely never get done.  So why did this article stir me up??  Here is what I came up with...

I completely and totally agree that the "world's" version of beauty and thinness and happiness all being mixed up together is completely MESSED UP.  I have so many many BEAUTIFUL girl friends of all different shapes and sizes.  They are all beautiful BECAUSE they look different.  It's like the saying in the Disney Movie the Incredibles: If everyone [had small noses] no one would.  Feel free to insert any phrase into those brackets: big eyes, small waists, thin hips, big boobs ... whatever it is about yourself that you wish you could change.  We are ALL beautiful ladies!  Period.  Start focusing on the things you DO like about yourself and stop obsessing about the things you wish you could change ... be happy with who you are.

Where I run into trouble is trying to reconcile this strong strong strong belief I have that women need to start creating their own positive body image and STOP comparing themselves to other women ... with the fact that I'm now changing so much about my life and my body and ... I really am happier.

I get it now though ... ready for this ... I'm not happier because of the way I look ... if that were true, I wouldn't be happy at all because, honestly, how many of you ladies could say you would be ecstatic to weigh 214 pounds??? Right??? (Only those of us who have been bigger ... perspective :)) But I still have so far to go to reach my "healthy body weight" ... that it CAN'T be that.

I'm happier because I am already living a HEALTHY LIFE STYLE.  I eat well, fuel my body, and give myself a boost of energy every single day with exercise.  Exercise gives people endorphins ... endorphins make people happy ... and happy people don't hate themselves.  They just don't.

But to get back to the article ... I love that this man loves his wife just for who she is.  I am SO thankful I have a man like that in my life.  The only thing I would say is this: don't let your kids be your EXCUSE for not living a healthy lifestyle.  There are a lot of excuses out there. You really will have More energy and More happiness and More self-confidence to share with your kids if you take the hour or so a day to make yourself more healthy ... and THAT will make you a Better Mom.

The End.

Grrrrrrrr.

I've gained 3 pounds since my husband came back.  Blast.  And we've been BUSY! And I know weight is just a number, but still ... it's frustrating. It has to be my nutrition ... and I have a new theory ... I don't think it is because my husband likes some unhealthy food every now and then so I don't have the will power to resist when he eats it ... I think it's because I stop working towards a specific GOAL once he is back! When he's gone I think to myself all the time "I have to work harder today, I need to look good by the time he gets back." Or "I can't eat that right now, I have to look good when he comes home." You know?? So, I'm going to try something absolutely revolutionary ... I'm going to set some goals while he is still home.  I know, crazy right? And, since you all know everything about me anyway, I'm going to share my goals with you, to keep me accountable: 8 weeks from now I want to weigh less than 200 pounds.  16 pounds ... it's a high amount, but totally do-able.  I will check in every week to keep you posted on how it is going.  GULP!!! Here we go ...